The Moment of Homeless and Jobless

life is a flow of uncertainties. When you wake up in the morning, you see the different colours in the nature. You hear different sounds in the surroundings. It can be a human voice. It can be the birds. It can be the animals. It can be your own voice echoing in your chest or, buzzing in your head. They have meanings. They have voice to speak out loud to make you hear. However, it is up to you to listen to those voices or to ignore them.
One day in the freezing afternoon I was heading to the Canada place to get some information about parents visa process. When I was at the parking lot, I saw a man in dirty clothes not enough to keep his skin warm sanding by the car. As I opened the door, I saw him extending his hands towards me. I stopped and asked why he was pan handling instead of doing some jobs. He didn't answer my question at once but smiled. He looked like Asian by the color of his skin, but his accent was purely Canadian. His hands were shaking with cold and voice was incoherent. A pungent smell of  Alcohol could hit my nose. I checked the cup holder for the change in my car and found two loonies. I gave him one and kept one in my pocket. As he saw another loonie with me, he asked for that too. I gave him the remaining dollar and drove off. Later I realized that it was a good luck for me to meet him before I go for some important work regarding my mom's visa.
Here, I would like to make it clear that there are so many unseen signs in the surrounding. We rarely look into them. They just come and go in our path. But if we try to listen the voice of the nature, they truly guide our soul and show the direction to our steps. The flow of ideas comes and go every time in our head. They never stop. Some of the are negative thoughts and some of them positive. Mostly we don't realize when the positive thoughts pop up. But when the negative thoughts do appear in the head, it hangs up for long. They have more gravity than the positive thoughts.
Let me share my own experience. I was living in Edmonton AB with a decent job with benefits and pension. My wife had a job under her nose just across the road from the place where we used to live. After all the expenses we could save at least three thousand every month. I had enough days off, vacations and sick leaves. I could live a comfortable life without any stress. We could take care of the children of the higher standard. Despite of all these benefits, my intuition always scratched my head. I was not happy with the life I was living. First, the weather of Alberta was biting in the winter. Second, most of the friends used to work seven days a week, days and night. When I was bored and wished to spend sometime with friends, there was no possibility. Third, the job I was doing was challenging but most of the time boring. I also knew that wherever I go, I had to do the similar kinds of jobs and meet the people having similar kinds of attitude. Every time I tried to listen to my intution, it clearly advised me to change the location. During the period of mental turmoil, I viewed multiple houses in Edmonton to give my offer. However, I could not take a decision on time. As a result we ended up not even putting any offers for the houses. I talked to my wife about my plan. She was also not happy with the weather of Alberta. She approved my proposal at once.
I resigned from the job with multiple employers. It was not the easy task to resign from all the jobs before stepping on the another job. When I came to the final decision, I started the preparation of move. I talked to a few friends in Toronto for the rooms. There was a complex process to find the apartment without my physical presence. Even if we got the apartment in the reasonable price, we must have to pay the first and last months rent as a deposit. Not only that the rent was extremely high.  The single bedroom price was over sixteen hundred. We needed double bedroom. The average market rate was eighteen hundred. Taking everything into consideration, I talked to Yam Basnet who had purchased a house recently and asked the availability of the space. We though it would be the easy step to move Toronto. We rented the basement apartment with two bedrooms priced $1300.00. I booked movers for the transportation of the furnitures and other stuffs. The mover company estimated 700 hundred to 1 thousand for one bed room furnitures. I sold most of the small stuffs. All the books I had collected over five years were given to Manis Kharel. Some of the stuffs were given to Bishnu and Rajendra. I sold the treadmill and dining tables. Also I sold my car to the neighbor in three thousand. I was expecting around four thousand, but it was a little rush at the last moment.
The first day of the month of August, we were completely jobless and homeless. Both of us resigned from the first of August. We took a shelter in Bishnu's house for two days. Finally boarded the train on the third day of August.
It was an emotional move. We were not sure what would happen to our life. We both left the easy job and choosing the hard path. It gave birth of anxiety in my mind. I wasn't happy at the last moment. Most of the time I silently regretted of my decision. But there was no other way. I had already jumped into the water. I did not have time to think. I had to swim across the ocean, or die. So I made up mind strong. I determined not to look back.
The moment we left Edmonton was emotional. My closest friend Bishnu's family were the one who shed tear on our farewell. There were other friends too, who were sad when left Edmonton. Our five years stay was also rooted on deep relation of love and friendship which was heart broken at the time of separation. It was not only with people but also with the place. Edmonton had given me a lot of things. I had friends, clients, employers, place to stroll, place to go for biking like river valley. I had a beautiful garden with vegetables. I had a place to enjoy with craft beer. I was going to be separated with all of them. My heart was pounding. My head was reeling. It was the time to think seriously about the future planning. BECAUSE we were both jobless and homeless. Despite all these hardships and fogs in our vision on our path, we had strong determination to face the challenges.